The Window

there’s a window
where the anesthesiologist’s pain relief didn’t take

shut the fucking window
a sentence i internally screamed
at the nurse who told me
no
to changing positions during labor
to sushi after delivery
to if she believed i could push out
an 8lb 8oz O.P. baby
from my narrow, tilted pelvis

she was wrong.

the window stayed open
i stifled my screams
and she was born
sunny side up
a Leo
of course she needed a window open
she needed to be seen
as much as she was born
to view the sun
due on 8/8 and 6 days late
everyone
would remember her
entrance

shut the fucking window
the words i’m internally screaming
at everyone who needs a glimpse
at our pain
i stopped asking if they believed in me
they’d say no

and

they’d still be wrong

but i learned from my Leo
i will still cry out
and no matter how much i scream
the windows will always stay open
right, Peter?

it took an anesthesiologist’s failure
for me to remember
i’ve always known how to fly
Captain Hook may be a villain but he taught
an important lesson
my happy thought is her
so
let them
hear me wail.

she’ll always be facing us up
showing us the way
to Truth

open every fucking window
she wants you to see
and how else
does the sun get in?

i’ll follow her lead
and face the Light.

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Fight Like A Mother: A Celebration of Resistance and Resilience.
A Mother’s Day Poetry Collection